Obama’s Top Ten New Ideas for Fighting ISIS

Obama’s Top Ten New Ideas for Fighting ISIS


With ISIS taking more towns in Syria and, on the other front, closing in on Baghdad, it appears President Obama’s strategy for “degrading and ultimately destroying” the Islamist psychos is failing.

Some are calling for boots on the ground. But this is not necessary, as Obama has a backup plan. In fact, he has many ideas he hasn’t tried yet.

Obama called last night to share his thoughts with White House Dossier. We agreed the conversation would be off the record, but this morning I decided, Ahh, screw it.

Here then, the Obama’s top ten new ideas for fighting ISIS:


1. Convince ISIS fighters that virgins awaiting them in heaven frequently “have a headache.”

2. Point “This Way to Baghdad” road signs the other way.

3. Promise, if they’ll stop fighting, to upgrade their iPhone 5′s to iPhone 6′s at a discount even if their…

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